A common trait of introverts is their tendency to overthink just about everything. One of the reasons why they are so quiet is because thoughts are rolling around in their head just about all the time! After all, they have a lot to think about, because they are usually overthinking the past, the present and the future! As an introvert, I also know that my overthinking can be a wonderful trait when it protects me from making bad decisions or saying the wrong thing. However, many times it can be a curse when it prevents me from taking productive action and moving forward.
According to scientists, two areas of the brain– the frontal cortex and Broca’s area are very active in introverts. The frontal cortex is responsible for remembering, planning, decision-making, and problem-solving, while Broca’s area is associated with self-talk. Once I learned that this is the way I am naturally wired, I quit trying to silence the many thoughts rolling around in my head. Instead, my goal now is to accept those thoughts and to keep moving forward. Yes, it’s easier said than done, but introverts can accomplish this with intentionality.
Overthinking the past: I was reminded of this recently when I saw a GIF on a social media feed. A frog is sitting under a faucet of water splashing on his head, and he has a blank stare. The caption: “This is me in the shower…thinking about all of the stupid things I said in high school.” I shared this with some other introverts, and they laughed out loud and commented, “I totally get that!”Sometimes we overthink a past social blunder, an awkward reply to a question or the way we showed up during a presentation, Introverts commonly overthink about how they did, what they said, and hindsight is always 20-20. Therefore, many times the introvert will beat themselves up for their imperfections, or what they did not say or do. When overthinking the past, evaluate the experience and realize that we have “do-overs” with just about everything. Maybe we said or did the wrong thing, but receive those experiences as lessons to propel you to stay in the game and be better next time. The curse is when you beat yourself up and then shrink back into safety, taking yourself out of the game.
Overthinking the present: Introverts often tell me that they many times want to speak up or ask a question in a virtual or in-person meeting, but they are afraid of interrupting someone else. So they wait until the perfect time, and then the topic of conversation moves on to something else, and the introvert has never spoken. I remember those times too well in college when the professor would ask the students a question, and I was too hesitant to be the first to raise my hand. Inevitably, someone else would raise their hand with the exact answer, and as a result, receive affirmation from the professor. This hesitancy can later transfer to the workplace, when introverts have an idea but are hesitant to share it, and they find themselves frustrated when their colleague speaks up first. When overthinking the present, realize that there is never going to be “perfect” time for something. When you wait for “perfect”, you will miss the opportunity. As John Maxwell says, “Opportunities never look as good coming as they do going, and they wait for no one.”
Overthinking the future: Most introverts hate surprises; however, most everything in the future is going to be a surprise. Therefore, they overthink about all of all of the possibilities such as, “What could go wrong? What if this happens? What can I do to eliminate as much of the unknown as possible?” Although it can benefit us to pre-plan, if done excessively, it can unnecessarily eat up a lot of time and productivity. Most of the time the only way to get answers is to start moving forward. As you take action, more and more is revealed to you along the way, and you will find yourself making progress rather than standing still and feeling exhausted from excessive attempts to analyze the unknown.
If you overthink, use the benefits to your advantage. Keep moving forward. Don’t let the trap of overthinking cause you to shrink back into safety or be paralyzed into taking action.
